Dear Bough: I Found The One

Kaya sure ako that these same things will bring our love past long distances, weight gains, receding hairlines and aging faces. I’m pretty sure I found The One in him. I hope he found his in me.

 * taken from the internet

Dear Bough,

If you are to ask me kung paano kami naging kami, I would first say na walang ligawan na nangyari. Hirap paniwalaan nun, no? But it’s true - he never pursued me, and neither did I.

I first met him in a youth org four years ago. Even after months since I joined di ko siya napapansin. The only time na napapansin ko siya was kapag tumutugtog siya ng piano, kasi childhood frustration ko yun. While he wears glasses (four-eyed guys lagi ang peg ko haha), he’s very serious looking  and masungit na parang terror professor. And I seldom see him interacting or kidding around with other members, so I didn't bother talking to him - katakot e.

Then came our org's Christmas party. We were paired up in a game - one where you're supposed to put a masking tape on as much body parts that you can name that starts with an assigned letter. That was the first time I got to talk to him. We had fun and in the process, nalaman kong di naman pala sya ganoong kahirap kausapin. Days after that, mukhang di pa siya nakaget-over sa game kasi he messaged me on Facebook, saying: "Sayang ang "patella", ngayon ko lang naisip". I told him that I was still hung-up on the game too. That's how we started chatting over FB, usually about 90s stuff and video games.

Our chats weren't really a regular thing, until this happened: may time na gumamit siya ng Tagalog word na sa sobrang lalim di ko mainitindihan (malinsad yung word. Haha) so tinanong ko kung ano ibig sabihin. He told me its meaning then offered to send me a Tagalog vocabulary word everyday, which I accepted. Everytime na nagsesend siya, listahan talaga, complete with sample sentence. Ang dorky lang hahaha. Whenever he sends one, we always get into a conversation and it happened almost every day. It continued until summer, when he went into hiatus.

FB chats resumed by the following school year, even if sometimes wala siyang baong vocabulary. What I liked most about our conversations was that it was almost always..."intellectual". To me he was engaging in his own dorky way. Di sya nagpacute, di siya nambola, never even asked if I had a boyfriend, but he always showed interest in what I think. I was also interested in his opinions kasi mataas talaga tingin ko sa kanya, parang kuya. Technically kuya ko nga siya, what with the six-year age gap.

In the org I started noticing the rare times he smiled (and whenever he did I really find him cute), the dorky way he walks, and the scary way he looks beneath his spectacles. At school (we attended the same university) I see him sit on a bench in front of his building every morning when I go to my building, either intently reading a book (medyo suplado), or playing with a stray cat (super adorable!). He looks really good, if not the best, when he's playing the piano or when he plays with a cat. It took me time to realize that I'm starting to like him as a guy. But because he never expressed his interest in me as a girl, I thought the feeling was rather one-sided, but I was happy with my lot. After all, friends na kami, at kahit na magkaalaman pa, I know that he will never make fun of me. So ok lang.

Yung tapatan namin ng feelings, ang bagal at ang corny ang process. As in. One stormy night, in the midst of our usual chat, I posted a stat in Korean, on how I found the night so beautiful because I knew he and I, though far apart, were both drinking tea. Cheesy, I know. I expected that aside from my few Korean-speaking friends, no one would know what it meant, especially not him. But I got the shock of my life when he posted a comment on my stat in Latin verses. Medyo tinopak lang ako siguro, kaya I replied with another verse in Korean. I don't know what has gotten into him, but he replied in Latin ulit. Habang humahaba ang “poem”, lalo akong nagduda, lalo akong umasa na baka may gusto rin sya sakin. But in those exchanges of verses, feelings were just implied, written in third person, walang derechahan, so malabo pa rin. He never talked about it in our chats, and neither did I.

Days later nagkaroon kami ng pustahan, natalo ako. So nilibre ko sya sa isang cafè. Would you believe na after almost half a year na nakakachat ko sya, ngayon lang kami nagkapalitan ng number?  It was our first time going out together, and the first time na nagkausap kami in person nang matagal. Now we count it as our first date – his first date. Over latte and tea, we enjoyed each other’s company, but no, walang aminan na nangyari.

Di niya yata kinayang nilibre ko siya so he decided to return the favour as well a few weekends later. We returned to the same cafe. I bit the bullet and asked him indirectly, kung ano ang gagawin niya kung mayroon siyang nagustuhan na girl na gusto din siya. What he told me was well...what I expected of him. I admire that he is a man of principle, but his words hurt me nonetheless, no matter how hard he tried to soften them up. Still I respected his opinion and I decided to forget my feelings for him and just regard him as a friend.

After that encounter, on our usual FB chat, nagsimula siyang magtanong tungkol sa guy na gusto ko. I was rather bold to tell him yung traits niya, kung bakit ko siya gusto, kung bakit ayoko na siyang gustuhin. Kulang na lang sabihin kong siya yun, pero di ko na sinabi kasi ayoko nang makarinig ng words of rejection from him. Days of charades continued until siya yung di nakatiis. One midnight, he texted me that he knows that I was talking about him, and that he likes me. That midnight is what we now count as our anniversary. We did not become an actual normal couple until months later for certain reasons, but we knew each other's feelings, so for me, kami na nga nun.

Our attraction for each other is not skin-deep. Of course there’s also love, but more than that our relationship started and is still nurtured with sharing of ideas, sharing of faith. Our mutual acceptance, understanding and support were what brought us past the nakakakilig na first months with our love still strong – even after almost 2 and half years. Kaya sure ako that these same things will bring our love past long distances, weight gains, receding hairlines and aging faces. I’m pretty sure I found The One in him. I hope he found his in me.

Happy Valentine's!

Meow Meow

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Dear Meow Meow,

Teka, kinilig ako. Ahihihi. Im sure he found THE ONE in you too. Do I hear wedding bells ringing? Ahihihi. Hopefully soon.

Ikaw na yan 'te!

Bough

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Share your love story. OK lang whether happy or sad. Send me a PM on my FB page or email me at direkaleckx01@gmail.com. Your identity will be treated confidential. Love, love,love.

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