Nakaka-tumbling na Chinese Deli - The Filipino Rambler

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Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Nakaka-tumbling na Chinese Deli

We all love to eat! Pero would you order a "Saliva Chicken" or a "Chicken without a Sexual Life"?

Here are some of the menu released by the Chinese government for the Olympics tourists.

At syempre dahil puro chekwa ang pangalan ng dishes,they decided to translate the names in English with the use of a computer translator- however,translating it led to bizaare results.

Here's the result of the literal translation of the Chinese deli.Read on:


Braised Lion's Head
Braised Lion's Head- Stewed Pork Ball in Brown Sauce (Lion's head- huwat???!!)

Happy family- Stewed Assorted Delicacies (anong konek?)

Chicken Without A Sexual Life- Steamed Spring Chicken (dahil 'virgin' pa ang isang spring chicken or more in the sense of not having reached adulthood kaya ala pa siyang sexual life..di na masama..hehe)

Husband and Wife Lungs Slices- Pork Lungs in Chili Sauce ( o syempre,left and right and lungs kaya in the literal sense,mag-asawang baga- make sense,huh!lolz )

Ants Climb up a Tree/ Pigs in a Blanket- Sauteed Vermicelli with Spicy Minced Pork ( kung paanong umaakyat na langgam yan- di ko rin maarok! )

Strange Flavored Shredded Chicken- Special Flavored Shredded Chicken ( sus! muntik ng sumakto! sa kanila pala,they find the word strange more appetizing than SPECIAL )


Saliva Chicken..
Saliva Chicken - Special Flavored Shredded Chicken ( eto ang dahilan kung bakit yan tinawag na chicken saliva- because this dish will cause you to salivate! maglalaway ka sa sarap!..di naman literal di ba? hehehe )

Three Color Roll- Squid Rolls stuffed with Bean, Ham and Egg Yolk

Three Fresh Things from the Ground- Sauteed Potato, Green Pepper and Eggplant ( now we know these things are from the ground..and mind you,it's fresh! c'mon! 'wink' )

Three Colored Shredded Beef- Stir Fried Shredded Beef with Vegetables ( Kung anumang gulay yan na may tatlong magkakaibang kulay ay di na nabanggit.. kalabasa, red bell pepper at okra ba ito?! )

Eight Delicacies Rice- Eight Treasures Rice ( syempre effort naman kung ilista pa yang walong yan di ba? )

Five Fragrances- ito daw ang literal meaning ng Spicy Roast Beef

Coral Shoots- Sweet and Sour Bamboo Shoots

Squirrel Mandarin Fish- Sweet and sour Mandarin Fish (kung paanong naging squirrel ang sweet and sour ay di ko din alam )

Fish Fragrant- Yu- Shiang Eggplant Sauteed with Spicy Garlic Sauce ( o, magtaka pa ba tayo kung anong konek ng fish fragrant na yan? lolz )

Tofu made by Pockmarked Old Woman- Mapo tofu/ Stir Fried Tofu in Hot Sauce ( o hindi ba? tatumbling ka talaga pag yan ang inorder mo? well, pock means numb as in you will feel numb sa anghang ng pagkaing yan! akalain mong nai-way pa yan!)


Cow's Horn Roll..

Cow's Horn Roll/ Roll Shaped like a Cow's Horn- Croissant ( di naman malayo di ba? )

O eto pa:

French Beans in Coca-Cola
Stewed Chicken in Beer
Pan-Fried Chicken Wings in Coca-Cola Sauce

Kung tutuusin, di na rin naman bago sa atin ang mga literal translation na yan.. Strange or wierd as it may sound- marami ring pagkain sa atin ang may kakaibang tunog.

Di lang manok at baboy ang inaadobo sa atin- meron ding adobong sawa, bayawak, palaka, palos (eel) at uok (beetle larva). May ilan sa din na mahilig sa kamaro (cricket),kalderetang aso at Soup No. 5 (cow butt and balls). Ano kaya ang English translation ng nilasing na palaka o pinaupong manok o binigting bayawak sa gata? Ano kayang tunog sa English ng piniritong ipis, nilasing na langaw at estopadong dila ng langgam?



Husband and wife lung slices..


Chili pork blood..

Now,isnt it about time na ang native bopis natin ay tawagin na nating 'husband and wife lung slices'?At ang medyo maanghang na dinuguan ay tawaging 'chili pork blood'? Imagine sa carinderia,bibili ka ng bopis at sasabihin mo kay manang: "Isang order nga po ng Husband and Wife Lung Slices nga po!" O,ang sosyal di ba?


Now, what's your order? Indulge!!

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